Current mood:	happy
Current music:	Wofl Party by The Blood Brothers

I am back
ok so I know that I haven't been updating much, but my life is soo weird right now, I have no idea where to begin.

I have soo much more self esteem now, I used to be very uncomfortable with how I looked. I have found style that both fits me and I feel makes me look attractive. This means alot to me, because I have been feeling pretty low the last couple of years with how I look.

Then I felt like I was loosing a way of showing my creativity. And now I sing and scream. It is a bit hard but it is a challange I have fallen in love with. My band "Scream For Him" (it has nothing to do with the band "HIM" which I have only actually listened to once) My inspiration to start singing again, came from the band "The Used". Unfortuantly their new album broke my heart and alot of trust in their singing. Their first album was seriously a piece of art, and their newest album sounds like a pop emo band. Which is what they are not. Now I have nothing against pop emo (huge TSL fan!) but this new style is not for the Used. Though I understand because he had a voice problem that blocked him from screaming and singing. I still see it as no excuse for the new album. Ok sorry a ramble but I have a whole "Die For The Music" motto.

Blood Brothers also made me strive to scream and be open to new forms of music. They are soo great, it's amazing.

I was also at a Reclaim The Streets, it opened my eyes to the anarchist view of politics, I am not anarchist. But it made me think alot about goverment, and how much a group of people can change the goverment. How little impact is has on the gov't.

well...yes....

I experiemented with heterosexuality, and it put even more into focus how homosexual I actually am. In the long term I see my self with a man. Not a woman. I am in love with men. Plain and simple as that. I think women are beautiful, but not nearly as beautiful in the same way men are to me. I will marry a man. No kids though, lol I can't stand children anymore.

so yeah that is all I can think of right now, I will talk more little later. Everyone who reads this please comment. I miss you all!

-Josh